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April 5 2012 5 05 /04 /April /2012 12:30

When it was that we were slaves

The Pharaohs worked us to our graves

When Moshe asked for our release

The burden instead he bade: ‘Increase!’

So Moshe said ‘I won’t be vague

Let us out or get a plague.’

There formed a cloudy rouge miasma

The waterway to bright red plasma

Those who worked in potamology,

Were soon referred to haematology.


So Moshe asked, ‘Please free us Yids.’

The answer was, ‘Build pyramids!’

Moshe warned, ‘No time for jokes

You’re going to hear a lot of croaks.

You won’t think it too remote

When one of them sticks in your throat!’

That silly neighbour of the Libyans

Was overwhelmed- amphibians.


But after this he would not relent

The Israelites did not get sent.

‘For this next one you are no match.

So let us go or you will scratch,

And scratch and scratch and itch and hurt

Via little creatures from the dirt.

Horrid wiggly anoplura

Are you, big king, a pain endurer?’

Pharaoh rebuffed the Jewish plaguer

And then was chewed by mallophaga.

They swarmed upon them all with zest

For hair and armpits to infest.

Above Pharaoh’s screams they had to shout,

‘Just let the enslaved Jews get out!’


But that man had a solid chin

He wouldn’t let the message in.

Because he would not let them free

His land became a menagerie.

A trip to the zoo you may highly rate

Without temptation to reciprocate.

The wildest ones, you may presume

Will look for something to consume.

So heart and mind with fear enmesh

As they popped by for a bit of flesh.

At Pharaoh’s folk they clawed and chewed

With bestial fear they were imbued.


‘Please let us go,’ we did instruct.

But that iron will would not be bucked.

And in return for our non-release

Domestic stocks would now decrease.

The livestock felled in tides torrential

Of maladies most pestilential.

And no amount of veterinarian fees

Could combat the onslaught of disease.

That stubborn king would not relent

Despite these matters pestilent.

He could not see it as divine

The wilting flocks, insane bovine.


Again Moshe‘s approach rebuffed!

Pharaoh, well, he huffed and puffed.

He growled and grunted, started to pout

He simply wouldn’t let us out

So this time as if his arm to twist

A poser for the dermatologist.

For all Egyptian skin afflicted

Then movement and their rest restricted

Painful spots upon their faces,

Chests and legs (and other places).

For though the ache could soon abate

He wouldn’t deign to liberate.


Now that divinely hardened heart

Had been quite solid since the start.

That heart would not become enlarged

And thus the Jews were not discharged.

Then from beneath the firmament

A new surprise was heaven-sent.

Some balls of icy conflagration

Rained solid down on Pharaoh’s nation

To smash each home and crop and field

To try and make that tyrant yield.


But for that king was no relenting.

He wouldn’t lean towards repenting.

To liberty’s cause he would not warm

So the Lord sent him a hefty swarm

To tackle agriculture’s sector

Famished brutes of class insecta.

They consumed all till none was left

And thus of food they were bereft.


The next round of talks soon broke down

(It happens in that part of town).

To let us go he was almost frightened

But he thought himself indeed enlightened.

Evading and denying he obfuscated

So access to light was confiscated.

For seeing now was far beyond tricky

The atmosphere, extremely sticky.

Not merely was vision out of the question

Even moving was beyond suggestion.

It must have been hard as one of those

Trapped in this state without repose.


For his final refusal to negotiate

The terms on which to liberate

A special warning to all ensued

A danger for the first issued.

At midnight there’d be a rendezvous

From which first borns would not get through

Some shocks indeed were to be had

We count this first born to the dad!

For if younger offspring and their ilk

Were first to the guy who delivered milk!

Then was discovered in the panic and haste

That a strong point of Egypt was not being chaste.


Thus Pharaoh most intractable
Lost his slaves against his will.


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